Tuesday, June 29, 2004
Topic:Woohoo!!BlackOut!!
Song tat keepin me sane:Jet-look Wad u've done
Mood:Overwhelmed wif a tinge of sadness
Ok juz experienced a blackout at my area..i was at my bloody com when tat happen so was kinda taken back..look at the window n found i wasnt alone..ppl started screamin,mats started laughin n makin stupid noises bloody makin a fool out of themselves..but it was kinda fun though..could see wad realli would happen if s'pore had total darkness n there was juz a glimpse of it..my parents were like so engross to the tv when all this happen n my mom was like kinda pissed..lolz..she had a veri funni reaction..my bro went to the window n was singin the spongebod song at the top of his voice...n screamin for crabby patty..i was laughin behind..my mom look at my bro wif this odd look sayin wad does all tat got to do wif the blackout..lolz..made me laugh even more..aniwae i decided to roam ard the area since i got nothin to do..com down n it was gettin kinda stuffy n warm..saw alot of ppl carrying torchlight ard..i look up at the block n see tat ppl were all flashin their torchlight outside like in unison..it was quite a pleasant view..then i kinda headed down to 7-11 n for the first time it was closed...lolz..nvr seen tat 7-11 close in my whole time livin here..ppl were kinda waitin for it to open since it also has no light n electric...aniwae it was kinda nice to be livin in a world of darkness for juz tat moment..then u will truly appreciate the light n electricity..n believe me electricity is veri i mean veri important...electricity is to us like light is to plants..veri essential...aniwho enough abt tat...
aniway i was tokin to my mom juz now la..we were tokin n suddenly she told me todae date...which is the 29 of june..n it was abt 8.30 pm..n then there i was in total silent n suddenly my mind gone blank..i juz remember tat todae was supposed to be a special dae..supposed to be aniwae..due to unforeseen circimstances it didnt meant to be..so there i was lyin at my sofa n thinkin to myself..life is life n we gotta face it headstrong..n at last i did somethin which i thought i will nvr have to do tat is to delete the testimonials written by her..cos i saw tat she deleted all my testimonial..so i guess the new journey has now realli began..aniwae wif every click of the mouse when deletin the testimonial i kinda had tears flowin dowm..it was realli emotional cos testimonial should be written from the heart n wad she wrote i believe was written straight from her heart...n it meant alot to me..every word peirced right to my heart not onli once but i guess everytime i read the testimonial..all those sugarcoated words written sayin those mushy stuff sayin i miss u n how much yur loves grow each passin dae its kinda make me thinkin whether it was ever true...aniwae i did cried when the last one was deleted cos the last one was veri special...aniwae it a new beginnin rite..aniwae tat is abt it then..update soon..chillz u'll!!peace out!!
-Torres contemplatin death at 11:48 PM
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Monday, June 28, 2004
Topic:I gettin realli bored...
Song tat keepin me sane:Lloyd Banks n Ashanti-Southside
Mood:Super sian!!
Ok im realli sian..England is out of the euro 04 n of all ppl my idol Mr David Robert Joseph Beckham is the one at fault...haiz..there goes my England!! i tell u the abused i get from my frenz juz becos Beckham miss such a crusial penalty it is intolerable...but heck,they still the team n player whom i will support till i die..aniwae look likes it is holland lookin fav to win it so i guess its holland time to win it..but kinda hopin for portugal to win it..aniwho enough abt euro 04!!
aniwae i did promise to write abt the greatest gig ever!!aniwae i onli have 4 words to describe it'out of this world!!'and the korean group called PIA was also good but too bad the crowd was dissin them cos they wanted to see the main event but who can blame them!!but the gig was so superdelifantastically offthehook nowordcandescribe unless u were there man!!i sweat my ass off this gig n should as hell beats goin to the gym yeah!!but i do have one regret tat is i didnt buy the $150 tix man..or i could have seen them closer!!haiz..but no regrets goin to the concert!!
Me n the gang went to beach rd on saturdae to buy a shoe for my bro n eat at that makan heaven..i tell u i can go eat there everydae man!!the food is great!!then head down to town to catch movie...we watch godsend..n it was a scary movie indeed got me jump out from my sit quite few time...haha..it was fun...then headed to starbucks n grab some drinks n we kinda walk ard for awhile b4 we headed back to yishun..then we catch another movie at yishun this time it was around the world in 80 daes..a veri veri funni movie...cant stop laughin in the cinema..recommended if u want to have a laugh..then went home in a cab n caught the match...
sunday is a dae when i sleep n sleep n eat n eat...my usual sunday!!i miss doin tat...lolz..this few weeks b4 skool starts i goin to try to sleep alot more..to make up wif loss sleep...n try to sleep early..aniwae cant wait for skool to start..3 weeks more..haiz..still so long..aniwae tat is abt all for todae...writin the blog n watchin the czech n danes match at the same time..so be back soon...chillz u'll!! peace out!!
-Torres contemplatin death at 3:04 AM
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Wednesday, June 23, 2004
Wow jus too damn tired to write!!juz came back from the LP concert so i be bloggin tomolo..more details no worri aight!!at last can sleep for at least 12 hrs..lolz..i miss sleepin..im beginnin to lose my faith in sleepin..aniwae be back later for full update on the greatest live band ever!!yeah!!LP gig kick asses!!!chill guyz!!peace out!!
-Torres contemplatin death at 1:26 AM
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Friday, June 18, 2004
Topic:My Birthdae celebrations....
Song keepin me sane:Death cab for cutie-Transatlanticism'
Mood:in a state of euphoria...
So wad a celebration it is..altogther i had three days of my birthdae celebration!three days..woohoo!! i will eleborate each other to u...haha..
14 June 2004:
It started wif me goin to work..yea on my b'dae n i still workin well juz work lor..after tat meet them lor..well met them at town..so the gang was that but ali n yogen werent..but they had to work so cant stop them..there were 10 of us..so we went to watch movie,supposed to watch chronicles of riddick but sold out,then eternal sunshine of the spotless mind but left onli the first 2 row so in the end we watch The Best Bet yes on my b'dae we watch an uncle n auntie show..but it turned to be such a hilarious show..we made quite ruckus in the cinema,nothin new there..but if was realli funni n i learn quite alot abt 4D..after tat decided to hang out at some cafe since it was like ard 8 plus..first we sat at mcCafe at lido but it was too hot so i suggested we go a cafe at one fullerton there..so we took a bus that stop at millenia walk n we proceed to go to one fullerton while we walkin we were at marina square n tat was this unused dirty pond or sumthin n raymond make this wild suggestion to throw me in the pond..we all laugh it off..but suddenly they turn serious n they realli meant it i could see it in their eyes..then i quickly fled away n they all chase me..in the end they caught to win n carried me the pond n they threw me it!! yes they did..n i was freakin wet..my pants n socks was wet n luckily i took out my shoe...haiz..i decided to kick the pond water back n it splashed on eish n weixiong..lol...they were drenched..it was so funni..then i walk from there to the toilet shoeless onli wif a sock on..lolz..n it the toilet i get to inflict some revenge for me..n spray the rest of them water as i caught them by surpise..they were all runnin all ard..it was so funni..n now most of us were drenched..then we all proceed to one fullerton where we all sat the merlion for awhile cos thew cafe was kinda closed..then we all proceed to fullerton satay club to have a drink...they all of a sudden raymond n eish n izwan gone missin..as we all order our drink..we all talk n all as we all waited for eish all to come back..n to my surprise eish came back wif somethin..n they present me wif a cake..awwww.it was kinda sweet of them to buy me a cake,tiramisu some more..they light a candle n sing me the b'dae song..haha..it was veri veri nice of them..as i blow out the candle i made a wish..wish i shall not say..then we took pics of me feedin them the cake all...lolz..will post it..then we all went home..haiz wish it didnt end..it was great fun...before tat sinchun ask me to pick 4 numbers from 10 crumpled paper..then they will all buy the number but the catch i cant noe the number..then i found the number 3996 n on wednesdae drw the number came out 3986!! it was a starter!!damn miss by one number..haiz ..could have won at least a few hundred bucks..
15 June 2004:
Had to work in the mornin,woke up late n decided not to go to work..then slept till 1 n woke up went to the polyclinic to get my mc..i was runnin late cos i had to go out n have dinner wif deedee so i quickly rushed home n got ready..cos i kinda dont want to be late for this..but in the i was late abt 30 min late..sori for that dee..aniwae we went to go watch a movie eternal sunshine of a spotless mind..i will describe the movie another dae but the movie was veri nice n another great performance from jim carey himself..it was wierd movie for me cos it was becos of tryin to erase someone dear from yur mind..n i was watchin it wif deedee..wierd..lolz..but i nvr intend to forget or erase anythin trust me on that..but she fell asleep half way..lolz..she muz be veri tired..cant blame her..aniwae then we kinda lookin ard at pancific plaza n then headed to far east to take neoprints...my first wif her bein juz frenz..but it was nice..had fun takin the pics..maybe i post it..but it was nice...then we headed for dinner actually i wanted to bring her indochime to eat...but she insist that it was for 23 n above n i told her it was not..so in the end we headed to fish n co..then we go there n ate..then we kinda talked abt our life so far...yap we tok..we were still like jokin ard n havin a laugh..we did tok abt she n her new guy in her life..im happy tat she is happy wif him..aniwae i have no hard feelin or anithin..then we tok n tok till it was quite late so wee decided to go home..she went back to holland v to go home wif her dad n i drop her on the way in the cab...it was a veri veri nice day for me spendin wif a person whom i happi to have in my life even though we did have a past..so all was great..
16 june 2004
the last dae of my celebration, n i had to work in the mornin as usual n i was drowsin off durin work kinda tired i guess..then went home..n rest awhile..i found out at first that i was like the onli one goin clubbin wif the gerls..so i decided to roped in a few..tryin to psycho them to go..n in the end ali,yogen,eish raymond,izwan were goin..i n raymond had to persuade izwan to go..Aniwae met up wif raymond n izwan first as the rest met us there..n met up wif syahiran have way n he decided to follow us..syahiran keep askin us to go cheekys wif him but i stand firm on my decision to go zouk..funni thing was tat we met up wif razi in the train to go to work,we told we were goin clubbin n he decided to skip work n follow us..it was so funni..so we all headed to zouk..jueru,liwei,amanda,angel n sebastian were tat..n they were waitin for me to come in.. aniwae raymond n izwan wanted to wait for eish they all to come...so i n syahiran kinda go in first...n then razi went in n guess wad he was rejected...i and syahiran were already inside n paid already..he was devasted...so he sat outside wif raymond n izwan...they i went out to ask to try another entrance n still cannot..haiz.. so when eish they all came we all kinda knew tat eish n yogen cant enter so i ask them to try aniwae..no surprise there...so in the end the rest headed to mohamad sultan n try to go cheekyn i found out in the end they all went to Club 3.lolz..aniwae there i was at Phuture wif syahiran n jueru they all..the music at phuture was great man!!the sound was off the hook!!the crowd was awesome..the type of crowd i like..but it was too crowded it was so squeezy,u can hardly dance ard..but it was all fun..jueru they all had to go home early so left me n syahiran we kinda took over the whole dance floor...yeah..if was great but i was kinda sad that they couldnt make it in...it wasnt the same w/o them..haiz..but i try to make the best of it..after tat i n syahiran went mohamad sultan to meet them n they were problems amg them.. so we all decided to go but in the end i raymond,ali n yogen kinda hang out at syed till late..i reached abt 7 plus in the mornin n straight waway jump in my bed n woke up n 7 pm..it was great dae i guess since i popped my zouk cherry i guess..i wanna go zouk alot alot more...
there was my 3 daes of celebration i guess..it was a wonderful three daes!!haha!! n hope next yr be the same or even better!!well tat is all for now...chillz u'll!! peace out!!
-Torres contemplatin death at 3:08 AM
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Tuesday, June 15, 2004
i think im too tired to write...so i will write a full report on my b'dae celebration wif the gang..it was the best ever...i promised i write k..the last time i woked up n haven slept since was on sun 2pm..so it is like 36 hrs since i slept n i will onli have abt 2 plus hrs to sleep..damn got to work..so report to u tomolo.
Ps. tomolo goin wif deedee to celbrate my b'dae..hope it wont feel strange..lolz!!
-Torres contemplatin death at 2:09 AM
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Monday, June 14, 2004
Topic:My b'dae!!18 already!!
Song tat keepin me sane:Nada Surf-Popular
Mood:Estatic
Happi b'dae to me,happi b'dae to me..yes it sound pathetic but im singin to myself!! im currently writin in weixiong hse..watchin the much anticipatin match
England vs France whereby england is leadin..wat a present if england would to win the match..aniwae i be goin to work later abt 2 hrs n i have not had any sleep..damn i hate to work..haiz..on my bdae somemore damn should not have book..but meetin the guys after work for a movie n dinner...so i guess it be fun then n hope i dont tired myself then...haiZ razi snorin n damn do he snore man..btw beckham juz miss a penalty..damn it..aniwae i been goin wif deedee on tuesdae for a movie n dinner i guess..celebratin my b'dae..it been a while since i seen her so i dont how i react...but i guess somewhere in my heart i do want to see her..cant blame me rite..but she did wish me happi b'dae but was expectin a call from her but nvm..damn i dont want go work!!help me.. haiz..i shouldnt be haizin on my b'dae..so i guess tat abt it..kinda lazy to write rite now..update to u tomolo when i return home from town..so i out of here..reportin to u'll from weixiong hse..chillz u'll...peace out!!
-Torres contemplatin death at 3:48 AM
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Saturday, June 12, 2004
Topic:Argh!! gotta wake up early!!
Song tat keepin me sane:Songs by Death Cab for Cutie!!
MooD:Tired!! *_*
Damn it i like have abt 3 hrs of sleep!!i gotta wake up early cos i be havin a damn match at NTU..n the best thing i juz came back from a gruellin street soccer session..damn tired n sleepin..argh!! but nvm for the sake of usin my boot which btw i have not been usin for quite some time..aniwae hope we win tomolo...
On a sad note.. my dad was involved in an accident..luckily he onli got minor injuries.. but his bike was in a mess..n it was all this car fault who hit my dad... hope tat car crash in a tree..i told my dad to claim evrythin from this bloody guy...hospital fee n damages..even ask him to pay for the distress u brought to all of us..damn u reckless driver...aniwae my dad got a week of MC..so my dad be stayin home for a week..my mom told my dad tat we should have gotten a car from last time..but my dad told us tat until i get a license then he buy a car..so i can drive it when he dont use..i cant wait to get one..lolz..but i was shocked when my mom woke me up n said tat my dad was in an accident..haiz..wad a dae..3 dae to my b'dae some more..3 DAES!!
aniwae i discovered two of wad i seem to be a great great band!! Death Cab for Cutie n Nada surf!! they are totally of the hook man!! i keep listenin to their song on repeat!!highly highly recommended..nowadae i kinda listenin to more emo rock...guess i been feelin veri emo lately..gotta search for their cd man.. im lovin this two bands man!!maybe i put a song on my blog..seriously cant get enough of them..
tat abt it for todae..tomolo be watchin the euro 04 match at either sinchun or weixiong hse so maybe i blog there k..need to hit the sack now n i have at least 3 hrs to sleep..wish me luck then...chillzzz u 'll!! peace out!!
-Torres contemplatin death at 3:01 AM
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Friday, June 11, 2004
Topic: i feel so strong...
Song tat keepin me sane:Christina Milian-Dip it low Remix
Mood:no idea...
Yes went to gym todae n was late for 45 mins..damn the bus..had a great workout todae.n i feel oh so strong..i got to make sure i make this a regular thing man..kinda like workin out in the gym...aniwae went to eat my fav laksa agian.. n went home... juz a normal dae then..not much happen so i guess it be a short entry then.. n i have nothin to speak my mind yet..but soon i guess but not now...btw tok to her todae..she came back from camp..i guess its been a while..she muz be exhausted..well enuff of tat..gonna sleep soon..chillz u'll..peace out!!
-Torres contemplatin death at 1:36 AM
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Thursday, June 10, 2004
Topic:i want to go to Hogwarts!!
Song tat keepin me sane:Keane-Somewhere onli we noe
Mood:lonely....
Yes i watched harry potter!! n it was great!!the best part is it was absolutely free..hmmm..free?? ok we sneaked in the damn cinema..n seriously i felt guilty,i had the money n i was willing to pay..but the thrill was to temptin n i noe it sound so juvenile but hey i turnin 18 soon so i guess it was one for the daes..aniwae it wasnt my first..lolz..aniwae back to the movie..seriously i dont get it when ppl say assume tat harry potter is a childish movie w/o even watchin..it has alot of hidden meanin in it..n i wont go into details or i go on forever...n how they grow up so fast..harry potter look so mature..n so is ron n hermoine.. emma watson is juz so gorgeuos for a gerl her age..she n her britsh accent just turn me on..hope she be in alot more movie..but for harry potter n the prisoner of azkaban i give it 5 popcorn.. although there alot of scenes which was missin,overall the important stuff were there...so it was awesome jus awesome..
b4 tat i kinda had my fav laksa!!its been a while since i ate there n it still as yummy as ever..now i feel like havin a bowl of it again..*droolin* then after movie kinda slack at 925..aniwae i was hangin wif graydon n co...n btw Graydon dyed his hair ash colour...n it look so nice..jealous man..aniwae plannin to highlight my hair red b4 skool start...n plannin to paint my fingernail black...been dyin to do it since i dont noe when..will see..but seriously graydon hair was phat..
my b'dae is like 5 days way n still no plan on how to spent it..n i had this idea tat we go campin at sentosa..but have to see the rest..seriously we need to do something abt it man...it is my 18 b'dae..18 man!!legal to buy cigarretes,liquor n go M18 movie n legal to club!!yeah the last one im lovin it..legal to club!!damn i cant wait..but too bad i cant spent it wif someone special..u noe like a significant other..haiz..nvm..i still have my
FRENZ..well again will see how..
aniwae got to go now...tomolo hopin they do go to gym n not like tat tuesdae sunddenly last min somebody i shall not name was lazy to go..so hopin tomolo we will go...so i guess tat abt it then..chillzz...peace out u'll!!
-Torres contemplatin death at 2:39 AM
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Wednesday, June 09, 2004
Topic: Pls somebody help me!! im so bored!!
Songs tat keepin me sane:Seether feat.Amy lee- Broken
Mood:Bored to death!!
As u all can see im veri veri bored..n i truly detest bein bored!
it has been a veri uneventful 3 daes...well supposed to go gym todae n guess wad wake up early juz to hear tat fairuz was lazy to go..so rot at home as per usual..damn this sux!!i cant stand this feelin!!well i guess i have to conjure up somethin wif the gang n make them go out!!whahaha!!
aniwae as u can see my current song is from the punisher ost!! n caught the movie on saturdae ..sneak preview..the movie will be open till 10 june..n let me tell u the movie was juz awesome!! i give it 5 popcorn!!wad a flick..john travolta was awesome so too was tom jane n rebecca romign stamos..highly i mean really highly recommended!! look the endin...u got to see to noe..aniwae i still haven watch harry potter(must watch),shrek 2 n also a another must watch eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!! i got to watch this flicks man!!the problem is tat no one want to accompany me..tat the problem of singlehood..when i want to watch movie onli i will call deedee n she will gladly go..my movie partner..but now she is gone so is my movie experience..as for me i dont like to watch movie alone...i cant handle loneliness..there i said it...i dont handle loneliness too well.i prefer to be ard ppl i noe..in anythin i do..ya i noe,u muz be thinkin im a big baby..n i need constant attention..well i guess im used to it..maybe i juz have to watch it alone i guess!!will see how..
aniwae i was kinda sad tat last week on two occasion i was rejected from cheeky monkey!i was so frustrated..not tat it is their fault or wad..it is juz tat im underaged..but i see these 16 yrs old caucasian chick jus strollin in..wad the hell..aniwae it was a ladies nite i tell u was damn hot tat nite.. i mean the ppl there..but i cant enter..tat realli dampen my spirit n my mood..so eish wanted to go thawu bar so he try n he got in so were the rest..but yurs truly again was rejected!even yogen who b'dae was on 31 dec could get it!! it juz wasnt my nite..but hen graydon n yongsheng came n they wanted to go club 3 so they persuade me to go..so i kinda juz follow..n guess wad i got in..tat will be my first time in a bloody techno club..at first i was scared as i be enterin a place filled wif chinese ah beng n i be the most outstandin one..when i enter the music kinda blast into my ears.. n u dould hear all the techno song..as we took our jug..we drank it up n proceed to the dance floor..n i tell u i was dancin to a techno song...damn it sux..there was these grp of chinese ger they were starin at me they muz be thinkin wad am i doin here..but it turn that the guys at thawubar were not havin fun...as there was nobody at all..n i dance till i sweat..which is gd..it turn out to be a blessin in disguise..aniwae i think i be headin to zouk or cheeky on wed next week so i cant wait..
so i guess tat abit it for todae huh..i still gotta upload pics n caption all of them..haiz..tat sux..well after tat sleep n maybe later in the afternoon i head to yishun to eat my fav laksa..it been a while since i have tasted it..n im sure as hell miss it..chillz...peace out!!
-Torres contemplatin death at 2:25 AM
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Tuesday, June 08, 2004
Topic:A new look!!
Song tat keepin me sane:Ben Jelen-Come On
Mood:ecstatic!!
Hey i revamped my whole blog n it looks great!!im proud of my blog..n at last i noe somethin abt changin stuff abt my blog...well as u can see i kinda chose a dark theme..well i guess it kinda sum how im feelin n the mood im in..not tat im suicidal or wad...it is juz tat is a dark theme..n tat
Death is onli a beginnin i kinda like tat phrase...well the darker the theme the better..well been spendin two nights doin these stuff so i happi im finishin...juz need to post all my pics onli n addin caption to it..sound so easy but it is damn tirin..i have at least 5 albums to go...shit man..haiz..guess i juz been playin abt an hr of cm n head off to sleep..meetin fairuz n sinchun for gym workout!!yea buildin my body...aniwae i try to update more often k..aniwae it is 6 more days till my b'dae!!18 here i come n cheeky monkeys u cant reject me no more!!hahaha!! ok guys..chillz..peace out!!
-Torres contemplatin death at 3:42 AM
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Saturday, June 05, 2004
Topic:wad comes after breakin up...
Song tat keepin me sane:Ben Jelen-Come on
Mood:Mixed Feelin!!more of fucked up!
Well i guess alot of stuff is in my mind...i noe again i haven been writin..well for most of my frenz noe wad had happen rite...so for this blog i will speak my mind n nothin less...wad i realli feel n wad i truly feel..this actually meant juz for me to read n reflect back when i need to read it...so if there are those who read this please please dont tok abt wat i wrote ok..
ok here it goes..my 2 years n 10 months relationship juz ended..wif this wonderful gerl i had ever met...n it ended becos of another guy...i nvr nvr in my life thought it will end like tat...another guy...so tat kinda feel fucked up..here i am missin her so much n trustin her so much when she go camp.. n she is over there developin a feelin abt this guy..i cant do anithin but trust her when she go camp n all tat ..cos i noe how much she is deprived n love this type of stuff but i can t really do anithin but trust...yes trust.. trust is a dangerous weapon.. i mean real danger. i noe she meant well by tryin her darnest best to avoid him but he is her grp leader so she cant..so they got this bond or so called 'chemistry' when they talked...damn it u juz met this guy.. i dont noe whether it is me or wad,but i find it damn strange tat they kinda have abt 30 or i dare say more similarities abt each other...a boy replica of deedee.. cant imagine wad that be..imagine goin out wif yourself but a female version..kinda wierd thought..well to each its own rite.but seriously when we met up after so many days apart(i was veri veri veri excited)i thought we will have a great day..well to my disappointment,it turn out to be my worst nightmare..n she even lie to me...tat kinda sux!!well we both kinda knew tat it be comin but nvr nvr this soon..in my heart i wish it nvr came ever...to tell u truth i can see my whole life devoted to her..but well not for her though...all due to this thing call'RELIGION',well it sux but wad can i do..im not the religious heck i more of the satan incarnation...well not to tat extend though..but i do have horns on my head..n her parents strongly objectin her marryin a muslim..i hate tat single-minded ppl who think tat this religion is bad..not tat sayin it is good or wad..well i kida guess they doin it for their daughter own good.n the funni thing this guy told deedee tat she see her as a long term thingy more of the marrying material...god damn it..imagine u juz met n u say tat to a gal..i wont be totally surprised if she start to ignore u..i was wif her n i nvr say tat..cos it be jinxin in a way...n u noe me i kinda like my life to go wif the flow...n not pourin my milk when i noe i gonna drink it 10 yrs later...it be sour then..well i kinda felt frustrated n fucked up when she lie to me sayin she had to go holland v to help wif her parentin but actually u were goin out wif tat guy...omg tat was kinda the final blow for me...lyin to me n after a break up goin out wif the guy... does she noe i like have feelin too..tat was the knock out punch for me..but tat i was puttin a brave front..lookin veri veri calm..i mean i was suprised too..wad u expext me to do man i was like in the middle of lido..there i was tryin to understand her feelin n acceptin the fact tat it was nvr even her fault..well bullshit..in my heart tat i was sayin how could u do this to me...dont our 34 months together mean anithin to u.. i nvr knew it will happen to me..all this while i thought i have the best life anyone could have,a galfren who loves me,a perfect family,the best circle of frenz n my life was gettin on track but it all came shatterin down on me..everydae i will wake up wif a smile on my face noein tat im the luckiest person alive..but noe i kinda hate to wake up..cos the onli time i be wif her is my dreams...shit man this sound so pathetic!!well i guess tat is how my life is...everydae i go out wif my frenz i put on tis false front..enjoyin myself but in truth i was not havin as much fun as i used too..but yes there is a but luckily i have the best grp of frenz a guy could ever have..u all are the greatest.
when i break the news to them,i nvr knew they will react that way...that had this shock n i mean real shock n disbelief in their faces..it was kinda funni..but all suddenly turn veri veri serious...as i told them i could see tat they didnt take the news lightly..all were quick to blame her..sayin how she could do this..izwan was in total speechless..yes izwan..nvr speechless n he did..he was kinda the most disappointed..eish was kinda in a fury..but all were quick to comfort me..im so grateful for tat..thanz a million guyz..yes it realli sux n me bein the oh so cool guy this realli me make sum kind of a wuss..all this becos of a fuckin four letter word L.O.V.E!! i jus feel so sad,frustrated n in utter disappointment...my life has reach rock bottom n need to do sumthin asap...
i will dedicate this to my former love of my life...
U were the the greatest thing tat ever happen to me..u came into my life n brought colour n life to me in more ways than one.. i nvr knew tat a gal of yur status even love a common man like me back then when i was a total nobody..life was like a trip to heaven when u were ard..even when we had our fights n the makin up after tat..i still love u the same way..u were there everytime i needed help..u were my best frenz,my confidant,my sister,my lover,my mother u were kinda like everythin to me..we had our own world when we can be as childish as ever..i love evry second of it..u noe i will succumb to u when u give me tat pitiful n cute face of yurs..remember the poem u wrote to me,i still keep it n i will still read it as it will be wif me till the veri day i die n hope it be wif me in my coffin..tat was my little motivator.i will read it n i will be motivated..n thank u for tat..tat was simply the single best thing anyone had given me..i will remember the night spendin countless hr tokin to u...n we will sing to each other..it was the best..aniwae i want to thank u for bein there when i need u.thank u for carin for me n takin good care of me..thankin u for waitin for me to reach home when i go home late..thankin u for all the TLC u given me..thank u for withstandin my nonsense..i want to thank u for the present u bought for me..i will cherish it..i want to thank u for spendin countless hrs wif me..i want to thank u for everythin u ever done to me knowinly or not...most importantly i want to thank u for lovin me..u will always be in my heart..well the next best thing for both us is bein the bestest frenz i guess..
PS.im juz sayin how i feel when i type so...pls no hard feelin..i hurt u in any way im veri veri sori...n this is not targetin anyone..this iz juz my blog... i be back for more update...
-Torres contemplatin death at 3:09 PM
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